To Live With Purpose, Create A Family Vision – Episode Overview
Today’s technology has made it more difficult to get our kids’ attention – particularly around what matters. I grew up in a larger Italian family where we had regular family meetings to be sure we all know what was expected of us and what mattered to our family. There was great wisdom in creating a clear vision or mission for the family – one that we all could use as a guide at any point in our lives. I like to think of it as a performance standard – of a life “done right” – or a life with purpose. So many times we get caught up in the busyness of life that we forget to focus on living lives that have purpose and that matter. Having a family vision helps our kids stay aligned to what is most important.
Attention and Intention
This week, my attention is on providing consistent life guidance for our kids. My intention is to share how creating a family vision can provide THAT kind of guidance for our kids, in how to live meaningful and purposeful lives in spite of the noise and distractions they’ll meet in their world.
Meet our guest Scott Beebe
Scott Beebe is founder and leader of Business On Purpose, a business coaching, training and strategy group that works to help small business owners, and organizational leaders uncover things that they cannot see, and create game-changing strategies so they can take immediate action and live out their life and business with purpose and intentionality. Scott is also the host of the Business On Purpose podcast.
- Website: www.MyBusinessonPurpose.com
- Scott’s Amazing course: www.CreateAFamilyVision.com
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/scottebeebe
- Twitter: @scottbeebe
Episode’s Key TakeAWays
- To find our way in life – and to help our kids do the same – we need to provide guidance and structure – this is the value of a family vision.
- Our world sends so many mixed messages that our kids need to interpret and process. Coming from a clear place – like a family vision – allows them to stay focused on what matters most among all of life’s distractions.
- We create our beliefs by sorting through the messaging we receive. As parents, we are able to help our kids create beliefs of excellence, integrity, resilience, empathy and service as we increase our communication, questions and connection with them.
- Technology, though it can help us, can interrupt the important communication process between parents and kids. The more each party spends on their devices and not communicating, the greater the challenge in helping our kids start to form their beliefs. A great problem in helping our kids get ready for life isn’t because we aren’t physically present in their lives – it comes from not being verbally present in their lives.
- Empathy is developed out of the nuanced conversations we have with our kids when they are 2 and 4 and 8 and whatever age; they happen gradually as we constantly communicate with them.
- The more we ASK as parents – the more we help our kids “test drive” their abilities, thoughts and values. The more we TELL our kids, the less they assess and build their own perspectives.
- Be aware for the Braindead Megaphone – the loudest voice in your kids’ ears – what is it saying and what do they think and believe about it. Stay in touch with your kids – ask questions daily about what they hear, think, believe and notice. You can help quiet the meaningless or unproductive messages they hear and replace them with confidence in themselves and their own voice.
- A family vision is an anchor. An anchor doesn’t mean it is doesn’t move – it actually moves within a range. This gives our kids guidance in how to meet and deal with the world – of having the ability to know how to choose wisely particularly when parents are not around. An anchor or family vision is a standard against which you hold you and your family accountable that gives consistent guidance in a changing world.
- All kids need value-centered boundaries that are expressed through conversation and connection. These are actually freeing as they allow our kids to go through the world clear of who they are, choosing wisely and being part of the world. These boundaries or this vision helps them know how to successfully navigate life.
- In parenting, there are essentials and non-essentials – not everything is essential. Assessing situations from this place can help parents determine how best to handle situations they encounter with their kids. Non-essentials allow for greater flexibility than essentials.
- A powerful question to help our kids learn about values and accountability is “Were you proud of what you did, said, etc?”
Some question for parents:
- How often are you on your technology or devices? How much time do you spend talking to your kids and asking them questions?
- What is your talk like with your kids? Is it critical and judgmental or are you compassionate because you see your kids as a work-in-process?
- Where do you drop anchor – where do you set the expectations and standards to help guide your kids?
See Scott’s course – How To Create A Family Vision
- Detailed vision story
- Mission statement or motto
- Family’s unique core values
- Implementation plan
Contact Scott for more information: firstname.lastname@example.org
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